Beneath This Man - Malpas Jodi Ellen (книги серии онлайн TXT) 📗

It is.

The thought of him not being around makes my heart jump into my throat, makes my breath hitch and panic attack me. This is hopeless. I take myself back into the penthouse, upstairs to the master-suite and have a shower. I stand under the sprays of water absentmindedly soaping myself. Everywhere I turn, I see us – me and Jesse on the vanity unit, against the wall, on the floor, in the shower. We’re everywhere.

I get out, suddenly needing to escape the reminders of our intimacies. I flop on the bed, but soon shoot back up into a sitting position, panic invading my entire being. The times we have been apart he’s had a drink. Will he have a drink now? My hearts starts a painful gallop in my chest, working its way up to my mouth. The thought of Jesse mixed with alcohol is enough to have me dashing down to the kitchen to get my phone.

As I enter the kitchen, I get a waft of something smelling really good. Oh! I run to the oven and turn it off, grab my phone and dial John.

His low rumble seeps down the phone after the first ring. ‘He’s here, Ava.’

‘The Manor?’ I’m so relieved but at the same time, I wonder what he’s doing there.

‘Yeah,’ John sounds regretful. It makes me straighten up.

‘Should I come?’ I don’t know why I’m asking. I’m on my way back up the stairs to get dressed.

He hums down the phone. ‘Probably, girl. He went straight to his office.’

I hang up and scrape my wet hair up before shoving my discarded work clothes back on. My car keys. Jesse hasn’t given me my car keys back. I fly downstairs and dive into the boxes of my belongings, praying I’ll find the spare set. Eventually, I lay my hands on them.

I get to the smashed elevator and punch the code in, at the same time thinking that Clive won’t be happy. Since I’ve been here, the maintenance bill must have gone through the roof.

I run through the foyer in my heels and notice Clive knelt down behind his desk. I swiftly pass him without a word. I’ve no time for him this evening. The poor man will wonder what he has done to upset me.

‘Ava!’ I hear him yell after me. I wouldn’t stop, but it sounds like something is seriously wrong. Maybe the mystery woman has been back.

‘What’s up Clive?’

He runs towards me in a panic. ‘You can’t go!’

What’s he talking about?

‘Mr Ward,’ he pants. ‘He said you mustn’t leave Lusso. He was very insistent.’

He what? ‘Clive, I haven’t time for this.’ I carry on my way, but he grasps my arm.

‘Please, Ava. I’ll have to call him.’

I don’t believe this. He’s got the concierge performing prisoner guard duties now? ‘Clive, it’s not your job to do this,’ I point out. ‘Please, let go of my arm.’

‘Well, I did say as much myself, but Mr Ward can be very insistent.’

‘How much, Clive?’

‘I don’t know what you’re talking about.’ he says quickly, re-arranging his hat with his spare hand. He couldn’t look guiltier if he tried.

I pull my arm free from Clive’s grasp and walk over to the concierge desk. ‘Where do you keep Mr Ward’s numbers?’ I ask, scanning the hi-tech display screens in front of me. I notice Clive’s mobile sat on the desk too.

Clive walks over with a befuddled look on his face. ‘It’s all linked to the phone through the system. Why do you ask?’

‘Do you have Mr Ward’s number on your mobile?’ I ask.

‘No Ava, It’s all pre-programmed into the system. Resident’s confidentiality and all.

‘Good.’ I yank out the wires leading from the phone system to the computer and drop them in a tangled mess to the floor where they meet Clive’s jaw.

I hear the poor old boy’s shocked mumbling on my way out and feel a small pang of guilt. That will be yet another repair bill falling on the doormat of the penthouse.

I jump in my car and instantly notice a little black device on the dashboard. I know what that is. I press the button and, like I knew they would, the gates to Lusso start opening.

The whole way to The Manor, I pray repeatedly that I’m not going to find Jesse with a drink in his hand. This will be the first time I’ve been back since my discovery of its offered activities, but my need to see Jesse is overriding any nerves or reluctance I have.

Chapter 15

I pull up to the gates and press the intercom. John’s gruff rumble comes over the speaker and I wave at the camera, but the gates are already opening. I start the long drive up the gravel driveway towards The Manor and as I pull up into the circle courtyard, I look up at the limestone house, looming centrally and seemingly screaming out loud what goes on behind those doors.

I pull in next to Jesse’s car and quickly check my face in the rear view mirror. Considering the events of the last few hours, the last few weeks actually, I don’t look too bad.

John opens the door before I reach it and offers me a small, reassuring smile. It goes nowhere near making me feel any better.

We walk into the imposing entrance hall together and past the stairs, restaurant and bar. I hear chatter and laughter, but I don’t bother looking. I’ve seen it all before, except now I know why they’re all here.

‘Has he calmed down?’ I ask as we reach the summer room. There are people scattered around the seating areas, drinking and talking, probably discussing what the evening could have in store for each of them. I’m assaulted by a dozen inquisitive stares, and I tense all over. Did they see Jesse raging?

‘Damn, girl, you affect that mother fucker.’ John laughs to himself, giving me a glimpse of that illusive gold tooth.

I let out a rush of breath in agreement, but he affects me too. Does John realise that? ‘My man is challenging.’ I muse.

John looks over at me and flashes one of his knock out, rare, all white and gold teeth smiles. ‘Challenging? That’s a word. I call him a fucking pain in the arse. I’ve got to admire his determination, though.’

‘Determination?’ I feel my brow knit. ‘Determination to be challenging?’ I quip.

John stops as we reach Jesse’s office. ‘I’ve never seen him so determined to live.’

I suddenly want to go back to the beginning of our walk to Jesse’s office so we can continue with this conversation. ‘What do you mean by that?’ I can’t help the confusion in my tone. That little statement has me really very confused. I can’t see any determination to live. All I see is determination to give himself a seizure with stress. He’s self-destructible.

My breath hitches in my throat.

He’s self-destructible. Jesse has said that before – when he took me on his bike, he said that. What did he mean?

‘Trust me, it’s a good thing.’ John looks at me affectionately. ‘Be easy on him.’

‘How long have you known him, John?’ I want to keep him talking.

‘Long enough, girl. I’ll leave you to it.’ He takes his mountain of a body and strides off down the corridor.

‘Thanks, John.’ I say to his back.

‘S’all good, girl. S’all good.’

I stand outside Jesse’s office with my hand hovering over the doorknob. John’s unexpected and volunteered information, albeit vague, has pricked my curiosity more. Was he really self-destructible? My mind is racing with thoughts of alcohol, dabbling, lack of leathers and scars. I turn the handle and walk, with caution, into Jesse’s office.

I’m immediately insulted by what I see. Jesse is sat in his big office chair facing Sarah, who is perched on the corner of his desk. The woman is a leech. A thud of possessiveness slaps me in the face, but it’s the bottle of vodka sat on Jesse’s desk that has me more fretful. I can fight off unwanted female attention, as long as it’s unwanted. The vodka is another matter entirely.

They look up at me in unison, and she flashes me a fake, insincere smile. Then I notice a bag of ice resting on Jesse’s hand. I was right to have a touch of the green eyed monster. They look, in Jesse’s words, very cosy.